The One with a Super Mario Cameo

Fun Fact of the Day:  Throughout his Olympics racing career, Usain Bolt has run for only 325 seconds (including preliminary rounds) and won 9 gold medals. That’s 1 gold medal for every 36 seconds on the track.

Rio Olympics Final Medal Count

Today's Rundown


Swimming (kind of).  In the dramatic conclusion of Lochtegate, all 4 swimmers are back stateside safe and sound, although Jimmy Feigen is $10,800 lighter as a condition of his release. Over the weekend, each swimmer made a statement to try to clear up what happened that fateful night. In their accounts, the gas station bathroom was locked, so they decided to relieve themselves outside. Then belligerent and drunk Ryan Lochte tore a framed poster off the exterior wall. When they tried to leave the gas station, security guards pointed guns at them to make them stay and pay for the damage. After a translator told them what the guards wanted, the swimmers handed over about $51 and left. Lochte issued a half-hearted apology, saying that he “over-exaggerated,” because he was traumatized by having a gun pointed at him. The US Olympic Committee was not impressed by their shenanigans and is planning to take disciplinary action.

Track and field.  Usain Bolt cemented his title as the fastest man alive with his 9th career gold medal in the 4x100m relay. With this gold he’s completed his clean sweep of all the sprinting events over the past 3 Olympics. Team USA should have finished in 3rd in the relay, but they were disqualified when their 2nd baton handoff happened outside the permitted changeover zone. Fortunately, the Team USA women fared much better, running away with gold in the 4x100 relay, after they were nearly eliminated during the qualifying rounds because of a jostled handoff.

Basketball.  Team USA’s men’s and women’s basketball teams continued their Olympics reigns with landslide victories this weekend! The men have now won 3 straight golds, while the women are on their 6th straight gold. Unlike the men who had a few close calls in earlier rounds, the women’s title was never in doubt; they won their games this Olympics by an average of 40 points. After playing in the past 4 Olympics, superstar Carmelo Anthony announced his retirement from international basketball.

Wrestling.  Everyone will be talking about the “Magic Mike” sequence that happened after this Sunday’s 65 kg bronze medal match. Just seconds before the end of time, the Mongolian wrestler was winning 7-6. He and his coaches got a little too excited and started celebrating before the match was officially over. The refs didn’t like that one bit so they awarded his Uzbekistani opponent a point, tying up the score 7-7. According to Olympic rules, when a match ends in a tie, the competitor who scores the final point wins, so the refs essentially handed Uzbekistan the victory. The Mongolian coaches were furious and weren’t allowed to appeal. To show how mad they were(!?), they both stripped down to their skivvies and wouldn’t leave until guards escorted them out of the arena. 

Closing ceremony.  Last night, marked the end of the Rio Olympics! So long handball and dressage, we’ll see you again in 4 years! On top of winning 5 medals during the games, gymnast Simone Biles was chosen as the Team USA flag bearer for the closing ceremony. Even though she packs a powerful punch at her tiny 4’8” height, she admitted she was a little scared to carry the unwieldy 9-foot tall flag. But she didn’t need to worry, she made the USA proud again. The closing ceremonies ended with a handoff of hosting duties from Rio to Tokyo, including Japan’s Prime Minister dressed as Super Mario and popping up through a pipe.



Too much Fighting for the Irish. This was not a good weekend for Notre Dame’s football team. The team dismissed one player, and suspended another indefinitely. Why?  Five football players were pulled over in a car for speeding on Friday night, but then the cops found more than they bargained for in the car.  All of them were charged with possession of marijuana and 3 were charged with possession of a handgun without a license. Then in a separate incident on Saturday morning, another football player got wrapped up in a bar fight and was arrested for the felonies of battery and resisting law enforcement.

Jessica W Luther

Q&A with Jessica W. Luther

Read our feature on sports writer Jessica W. Luther to find out how she made the unlikely transition from a Classics and History graduate student to a freelance sports journalist and her new book “Unsportsmanlike Conduct: College Football and the Politics of Rape” coming out next month.